The Fire of Desire
There are many ways to express that human experience which goes under the umbrella of desire. Here is an un-exhaustive sampling:
want, need, long(ing), crave, passion, yearn, appetite, lust, hunger, urge, wish, thirst, covet…
René Girard understood that outside of the innate instinctual desires for nutrition and reproduction humans experience a kind of unconscious existential hollowness felt as a lack that is filled with what is seen in others perhaps only out of the corner of our eye as worthwhile or of some kind of value. In this way we borrow desire from others without our knowing it – we imitate.
Along with this lack is an affective or emotional component that poets have often described as a burning, consuming fire that like its physical world counterpart can both warm, light and serve as a tool, as well as ravage, maim, and destroy. Take as but one example of many the song by Johnny Cash, Ring of Fire
Until recently these metaphorical understandings were all we had to help us express the sensations of desire. But now the world of biomedical research has begun to trace what is believed to be the physiological sources of these experiences. By imaging the brain’s neural networks they have found mirror neurons as well as neurotransmitters such as dopamine and serotonin which influence our desires. The medical and pharmacology industries have made much of attempting to harness this in the hope of reducing suffering and increasing well being (as well as profits). However, results have been mixed and there is no doubt that in days ahead more will be learned. We are certainly much more complex than we know.
Materialists and utilitarians may find all of this inspiring but it will perhaps sound odd to hear poets crafting love songs with neurotransmitter in the lyrics. For it is love that seems most to dominate at least linguistically our imaginings of what we desire.
One hears the phrase “My passion is…” whatever it is the speaker is currently pursuing, or “I love…” whatever happens to be their object of desire. In the midst of all these influences on what we consider most personal, that most reflects who we are, we stop to ask, “Who am I?”
Again, the materialists and utilitarians have an answer – we are atoms, molecules, electrical impulses that are arranged to act in the organism’s self interest. While not denying our physical nature the Christian perspective proposes a different story. From the moment we as newborns begin to interact with our parents, families and cultural environment we start the process of layering models each of which will play a part in who we are becoming. In adolescence it is not unusual for a person to be intensely focused on some model(s) who inspire us, both helping to integrate into the adult world as well as providing alternative paths of nonconformity or even rebellion. In any case it is the model whom we emulate. Even fictional characters may become models for us as was the case with Don Quixote. My own experience as a thirteen year old saw me begin carrying a briefcase to school and wearing an English cap after encountering Ian Fleming’s James Bond. And of course like most of my peers I had to grow my hair longer (within the limits of the then enforced school dress code) to be like the Beatles. Into adulthood the expression of our imitative desire becomes more covert as we assert our individuality while making clothing choices that reflect current fashions and adopting the latest verbal tics and gestures.
Unfortunately, there is also a less happy aspect to the expression of desire which we know as thwarted desire. Girard detailed the experience in which a person in imitating the desire of their model find their model has become a rival for an object of desire which cannot be shared. In these situations resentment may lead to conflict which may escalate into violence. It is here where the fire of love can become the destructive flame of conflagration.
From the biblical accounts of the Garden of Eden through the Passion and Pentecost the fire of God’s love that created the universe burns giving light to a darkened and wounded world. May we so live that the warmth and light of God’s love is manifest in our thoughts, words and actions.
